December 11, 2010

I do believe this third round of chemo has about done me in! I felt worse on day 2 than I've felt before, and it was really just being more tired than that particular day with my previous treatments. I was on the edge of being nauseated off and on, and the only thing that finally made it go away was for me to lay down and rest last night. I don't like to take Phenergan if I'm up and about during the day, and I'm really just using it to help me sleep right now.

My previous Saturdays after treatment have found me full of energy (at least in the morning and early afternoon), but today, I slept until 8:40, didn't feel like showering until noon, and then didn't feel much like doing anything. It was almost as if I were operating in slow motion with everything I did. I hate that. Barry and Traci went to Memphis for some shopping, and they called me with questions about several purchases, but all in all, I missed out on a fun time. I hate that, too. When they came in with fun stuff, I smiled half-heartedly at what they had bought because I was just worn out and wanted to lay down.

And I did lay down for a bit, but I didn't go to sleep. I'm saving that for tonight! During the active part of my day, I wrapped several presents, and I folded two loads of clothes and emptied some leftover containers out of the refrigerator. That's about it for me today.

I've still got a bit of that breathless feeling, my shoulders and legs are achy, and I've had a bit of tingling in my hands today (probably some peripheral neuropathy) which I hope goes away eventually and stays away. If my side effects are like the past, I'll be achy through Monday night, and then I'll get better and better each day. My body feels tired right now, but my mind does not. I would take a pain pill for the achiness, but they've pulled Darvocet from the market and the pills I have with codeine make me nauseated. What's a person to do?

I just took a Jacuzzi bath, and I'm trying to relax before laying down for the night. Barry and Traci are at the Little Theatre performance of Pieces of Christmas, which I'm missing this year, and I know the cast will do well. I hate missing my family sing, too.

So the dog and I have taken up residence here by the computer with "It's a Wonderful Life" playing in the background. I'm thankful for this movie tonight because it gives me a poignant reminder of why I'm putting myself through all of this in the first place. It IS a wonderful life, and this time next year I'll be looking back at what a major inconvenience this was to me. Looking forward to next year!