March 13, 2011

I updated my CaringBridge yesterday, but I clicked on preview instead of post, and it didn't save! When I discovered it, I felt too bad to do it over again, so I'm just now sitting back down to write something. Yes, I have been pretty miserable this weekend, and I can't tell that the new drug did me any good at all. I had to start taking Phenergan again last night just to be able to do anything at all. Today, I cut my Phenergan into fourths, and every hour I've gone by and "eaten" a quarter of a pill to keep me from being nauseated. Limiting the amount keeps me from falling into a deep slumber, so I've been in a state of constant tiredness pretty much all day. However, I have been able to get a little done today in spite of being sick. I'll be SO very glad when chemo is over, and there is just one more treatment scheduled for me. One more.

If anyone had seen me this yesterday, they would have thought I was very ill because I stayed in or near the bed all day, and that is definitely not me. My little Tuffy has stayed right near my side, constantly watching my every move, very keenly aware that his "mama" doesn't feel good. Bless his heart.

I can tell today has been better than yesterday, but that wouldn't take much improvement. I was able to cook lunch and dinner, but I sat down or laid down many times throughout the day just to be able to manage. And bless Barry's heart. He folded clothes and did all sorts of things to try to make things better for me, and I love him for even trying.

Even talking on the phone has made me weary and the extra effort has made me a bit nauseated. Sorry if you've called to check on me and I haven't felt like talking.

I've been watching the news unfolding in Japan, and it has given me a bit of a reality check on my situation. I do know that the chemo in my body will go away eventually, and I will begin to feel normal. I felt great for two weeks before my treatment on Thursday, and I imagine the same thing will happen again this time. I'll be well just in time for another treatment--how fun! The people of Japan will have years and some lifetimes of recovery from what happened in just one day, from one natural disaster. God be with them.

I have a couple of upcoming dates that I am looking forward to, and they are my last chemo on March 31, then removal of my port three weeks later. Traci is scheduled to graduate from Arkansas State University with her education degree on May 7, so the future is bright. It's more fun to look ahead when today isn't so pleasant.